Welcome to Sunday’s article for all subscribers.
Throughout the week, I write daily reflections for paid subscribers. Sundays are my opportunity to open the doors a little wider and share something with the whole Sacred & Secular community.
Today I reflect on a woman who played an important role in Paul’s ministry and why even the most capable among us need other people.
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I love the way Paul finishes his letter to the Romans. After sixteen chapters containing some of the most influential theological writing in Christian history, he gets personal and starts mentioning people by name. Friends, fellow workers and people who had supported him along the way. Some are familiar to us, while others appear briefly before disappearing from the biblical record altogether.
The first person he mentions is a woman called Phoebe, and I suspect most of us have read past her name without giving it much thought. Paul describes her as a minister of the church in Cenchreae and asks the Christians in Rome to welcome her and provide whatever assistance she needs.
Many scholars believe Phoebe was the person who carried Paul’s letter to Rome. If they are correct, then one of the most influential documents in Christian history reached its first readers because of a woman whose life is otherwise almost entirely unknown to us.
But there is something else about Paul’s introduction that interests me even more. He tells the Romans that Phoebe has been a great help to many people, including himself.
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The woman from Cenchreae
Paul introduces Phoebe in Romans 16:1–2:
“I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a deacon of the church in Cenchreae. I ask you to receive her in the Lord in a way worthy of his people and to give her any help she may need from you, for she has been the benefactor of many people, including me.”
We actually know very little about her. Cenchreae was a busy port near Corinth, connecting the city with trade routes across the eastern Mediterranean. Phoebe belonged to the Christian community there, and Paul’s description suggests she was a woman of considerable standing.
He calls her a diakonos, a Greek word that can mean servant, minister or deacon. It is the same word Paul uses elsewhere to describe people involved in significant Christian ministry, including himself. Scholars disagree about whether Phoebe held a recognised office within the church, but Paul’s language suggests she was somebody with genuine responsibility.
Then comes another word, prostatis, which is sometimes translated as "helper" but often means considerably more than that.
In the ancient world, wealthy or influential people often supported others through what we would now call patronage. They might provide money, accommodation, protection or access to people who could help. Phoebe appears to have been somebody who used her position and resources to support others.
And Paul openly acknowledges that he was among those who benefited.
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The letter that needed delivering
It is difficult to exaggerate the influence of Paul’s letter to the Romans. Its discussions of faith, grace, sin and salvation have shaped Christian thinking for centuries. Augustine wrestled with its words, Martin Luther found them central to his understanding of the gospel, and countless Christians have studied Romans as they try to make sense of their relationship with God.
But before any of that happened, somebody had to get the letter from Corinth to Rome.
Communication was complicated in the ancient world. There was no postal service available to ordinary people in the way we understand one today. Letters generally travelled with trusted individuals who happened to be making a journey or had been specifically asked to deliver them.
And delivering a letter could involve considerably more than handing over a document.
In a world where written communication was often read aloud, the person carrying a letter might also explain its contents, answer questions and provide information about the person who had written it.
We cannot know whether Phoebe read Romans aloud or helped explain its arguments, but we know that ancient letter carriers sometimes performed these responsibilities. If Phoebe did so, she may have been among the first people to explain Paul’s extraordinary letter to its original readers.
Imagine that for a moment.
Paul has written an extraordinarily detailed letter to Christians he has never met. Some of its arguments are complicated, and his words might raise questions. He cannot simply telephone them afterwards to clear up any misunderstandings. Yet he appears willing to entrust the letter to Phoebe.
The responsibility was significant.
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The people Paul needed
I think we sometimes imagine the great figures of the Bible as rather self-contained individuals. Moses leads Israel, David rules his kingdom, and Paul travels around the Mediterranean establishing churches, writing letters and somehow holding the emerging Christian movement together.
Of course, when we read their stories carefully, we discover something different.
Paul depended upon other people constantly. His letters are filled with references to friends, travelling companions, hosts and fellow workers. People who provided accommodation, supported his ministry, carried messages and helped the Christian communities remain connected.
Without them, much of what Paul accomplished would probably have been impossible.
I sometimes wonder whether our familiarity with the Bible makes us forget just how human these relationships were. Paul experienced disagreements, disappointments and loneliness. He needed somewhere to stay, something to eat, and people willing to help him when things became difficult, and he wasn’t embarrassed to acknowledge it.
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When helping is easier than being helped
During my time in parish ministry, I became very familiar with the expectation that the vicar should somehow know what to do. People came looking for advice, reassurance, practical assistance or simply somebody who would listen. It was a privilege, and I genuinely enjoyed helping.
But ministry also taught me how dependent I was upon other people.
No parish priest can do everything, although I suspect many have tried. Churches depend upon an amazing collection of people who contribute their time, abilities and resources. Some take on considerable responsibility, while others do things that might seem small until the day they stop happening.
I quickly came to appreciate that leading a church did not mean personally doing everything within it. Sometimes it meant recognising that somebody else was far better equipped for a particular responsibility and trusting them to get on with it. That sounds obvious when I write it down, but I am not sure it always felt that way at the time.
There is something about being the person that others depend upon that can make receiving help surprisingly uncomfortable.
Most of us like being useful. We enjoy knowing that we can make a difference, and there is a certain satisfaction in being able to say that we have managed something ourselves. But needing help puts us in a different position. It means acknowledging that we cannot always cope alone, that somebody else may have abilities we lack, or that circumstances have left us needing support rather than providing it.
We might spend an entire afternoon helping somebody with a problem, yet feel awkward asking them for twenty minutes of their time when we need something. We encourage friends to talk about their difficulties, but when they ask how we are, we insist that everything is fine.
I recognise that tendency in myself, and I don’t think it has always served me particularly well.
There is an interesting connection here with something Paul writes elsewhere. In 1 Corinthians 12, he describes the Church as a body, made up of different people who need one another. He even says that the members who seem weaker are indispensable. I wonder whether his relationship with Phoebe gives us a glimpse of what that looked like in practice. Paul wasn't simply teaching Christians to depend on one another. His own ministry depended upon the generosity, abilities and faithfulness of others.
Perhaps the body of Christ was never intended to be a collection of self-sufficient individuals.
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Learning to receive
There is a temptation to turn Phoebe into an illustration of how important it is to help others. And certainly, her generosity deserves recognition.
But I wonder whether we might learn just as much from Paul.
Here was a man whose writings would influence Christianity for centuries, yet he was willing to acknowledge his dependence upon a woman from a relatively small Christian community near Corinth. Whatever authority Paul possessed as an apostle, it didn’t make him independent of the people around him.
We sometimes talk about Christian service as though everyone should be giving all the time. We celebrate generosity, sacrifice and the willingness to put other people first. Those things matter enormously, but a community cannot consist entirely of people who give while nobody is willing to receive.
Relationships work in both directions, even when the balance changes over time. The person helping today may need support tomorrow, and somebody who once depended upon us may eventually be the person we turn to when our own circumstances change.
There is nothing particularly shameful about that. In fact, I would argue that it is simply part of being human.
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Someone like Phoebe
I keep coming back to those two words at the end of Paul’s recommendation.
Including me.
He could easily have described Phoebe as a generous woman who supported the church. That would have been complimentary enough. Instead, he makes it personal.
She helped me.
Two thousand years later, we still don’t know exactly what responsibilities Phoebe held, how she came to know Paul or what happened when she arrived in Rome. But we know that Paul valued her, trusted her and was willing to acknowledge what she had done for him, and I think there is something rather liberating about that.
Perhaps we don’t always have to be the person holding everything together. There may be times when allowing somebody else to help is every bit as important as offering help ourselves.
After all, even the apostle Paul needed someone like Phoebe, and he wasn’t afraid to say so.
Question to ponder
Are you more comfortable helping other people than allowing them to help you? What makes receiving help difficult?
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Paul.